Do children make you happy?

Perhaps it does for women, but not for men.

"Moms report getting more happiness from their children whereas fathers ranked kids no higher than their career.

Women in relationships got a happiness boost after having children. Men only seemed to derive well-being from the relationship."

Source is here.

A better way to phrase this might be "do children, on average, make you happier"

Sometimes yes, they do. Sometimes no, they don't.

Happiness is often the result of focused attention on something difficult, but achievable. In this way, children might lead to happiness, as they fit the bill. But I wouldn't ever agree that by default children lead to happiness. For many, it's just the opposite. The answer to this question all depends on the context of parties involved.

Expert in the psychology of "flow" (related to the human perception of "happiness" or "creativity"), Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, is a solid reference resource. http://www.enlightennext.org/magazine/j21/csiksz.asp

I think that whether or not children can "contribute to your happiness" can be influenced by the circumstances concerning how one came to be a parent. Parenthood was deliberately forced on me when I was only 16 yrs. old. He was an already married man who was around five years my senior.

For remaining unwed after the birth of my daughter, I attempted to parent her while still under my own mother's roof. We were poor people..that has not changed. Even so, my child was taken care of there as if she'd been a sibling of mine. In fact, my parenting was all but completely usurped by my, now deceased, mother and a, also deceased, older sister who lived in the household at the time.

The married man had started me to drinking liquor prior to his taking control of my body. So, by the time I was 19, I qualified as a full blown alcoholic.....though my claiming the disease was still a few years away. I didn't realize it at the time, but my significance as a family member had been overshadowed by the birth of my beautiful child. She was the angel in our midst and I was, it seemed, now just some presence they only tolerated.

When I moved out of my mother's house, I left my child there because I felt it was the best place for her. For, not only was I drinking, but I had begun to live an alternative lifestyle. As I watched the 8 yr. old standing there with tears running down her face, asking me where I was going, I had no answer for her. I only said that I could no longer live there; that her grandmother didn't want me there.

My daughter is 39 yrs. old now and, though I had no other children, I am grateful I had her. Yet, in spite of this being the case with me, there have not been very many occasions during these last 39 yrs. where I really felt that we connected as mother and daughter. The reason for this, I believe, is that, for my mother and sister's interference and my leaving her there in that house to be raised by them, we never really bonded. Nevertheless, when she's not exercising her genetically flawed temperament, I feel content with our relationship.

As a grandmother, I have experienced much happiness! My grandchildrens' births were estatic moments for me and I endeavored to be the best grandma that anyone could possibly want. But now, with one being 22 yrs. old and the other turning 14 today, they seem to have little use for me anymore. So I just attend my church services on Sunday and be the sober God fearing christian woman that I have been for many years now. And when they have use for me, I am there for them, nonetheless.

So.....do children make you happy? Well, it depends on who you ask and where they're coming from. However, from a spiritual standpoint, I perceive them to be the greatest blessing God can bestow on anyone...whatever their circumstances. The problem is, in far too many situations they are not receiving the protection and sound minded guidance they deserve. And, for this, both they and all of society suffers in various occurrences.